Menagerie

"So how did it go," Wendy asked.

"It was really weird. I scared Lindy," I replied while untying my shoelaces.

"What?"

"Not on purpose. When I got close to her house, the neighbor's dogs started barking. Lindy heard the noise and tried to see what was causing the commotion. She said she saw something moving through the window, then I popped up right behind her by her door. I think she almost went into labor," I said.

"I doubt it. It's too soon," Wendy said. "So what did she say?"

"She was really happy to get the pie."

"I bet."

"Yeah. She was like, 'oh my God, you guys!'" I sat down at my desk. "You should have seen how surprised she looked when I told her it was pumpkin cheesecake layered pie."

"It's good pie," Wendy said.

"But there's more. There was some crazy stuff," I continued. "Since I was at their house, I decided to jog down Alii Road. After a while, I heard some metal jingling. I knew I didn't have my keys, so I looked around. There was this little brown terrier following me. Then some cars were coming, so I had to stop and get off the road so the dog wouldn't get run over. I was hoping the dog would have gone home, but he kept following me. So I just kept jogging. A bit later, I heard another dog barking and running after us. I looked back and it was another brown terrier chasing us."

Wendy giggled.

"But something looked wrong on the dog. It was running funny."

A curious look appears on Wendy's face.

"At first it looked like something was wrong with the dog's leg. It looked fat." I held my hands up as if gripping a melon to show her the size. "But when I looked closer, it wasn't the dog's leg." I moved my hands to a cupping motion. "It was the dog's balls!"

"Eww! No way," Wendy exclaimed.

"Yeah. Serious. The dog had elephantitis of the nuts!"

"That's sick," Wendy replied.

"So I get down to my parents and I take out Chico. I could only take him on half of his walk because he kept eating grass until he puked. I mean puke puke. He puked so bad he couldn't walk." I pantomimed a drunken dog. "I put him back in his cage and came back up here. I started jogging up Koko Road when I saw a bunch of kids on the road. I thought they were just playing, but when I got closer, I saw that they were all excited about a goat. There was a goat on the road. And guess what? The goat started following me when I jogged past."

Wendy laughed.

"Luckily it got bored and stopped half a block later."

I fiddled with my computer for a bit. "Holy cow! Babe, check this out. Airfare dropped!"

And now we will be able to visit Wendy's farm in Indiana.